It’s not staying in Vegas!
They say what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas! Not this time! I plan on bringing everything that happened back with me and implementing it into my life in every way I can!
Those 5 days in Vegas were so beyond inspirational I know I will never be able to relay that to anyone that wasn’t there. I felt like every workshop I went to was speaking directly to me. I was so humbled to be in the same room, let alone city as this industries leaders! People who inspire me on a daily basis were there in person! I am so blessed to have been able to hear them speak and have the opportunity to meet a few of them.
I learnt something very specific from every talk I went to and over the next couple of weeks I am going to do seperate posts on each workshop I went to and outline what impacted me the most. Tamara Lackey had the most inspirational quote that really hit me. “Is the life you’re living, worth the price you are paying to live it?” It was a quote from Tony Schwartz and it hit me the most. It really made me think. What was the price I was paying to live this life? Was it worth it? The honest answer was no. I was taking too much time away from Luca to spend on photography. I wasn’t spending enough time with Marco at night just enjoying each others company. I was so worried about what to do next, what photography stuff I should be working on, what other photographers in the business were doing.
Being a Mom to me makes this situation even harder. It changes the time I can put into this. Where other full time photographers have many hours a day to devote to photography, I only have 1-2 hours a day while Luca naps or after he has gone to bed. I don’t wany my following my dreams to affect his life in a negative way. There are some days where I am so envious of Jasmine Star and her ability to stand at her computer and edit pictures in her pjs all day. I am envious of all those other photographers who don’t have children, and that daily responsibilty of being a stay at home Mom. I knew before Luca was born that I wanted to stay home with him as much as possible. I wanted to raise my own child.
Now that Luca is older, wow is he ever busy! He demands 110% of my time. From standing on the kitchen table to reach the light, to climbing up on the computer desk to throw the keyboard on the floor…HE IS BUSY! I have had to become a better time manager! No more editing while he plays on the floor. No more answering emails while he eats a snack. I am very much divided in my life, and I struggle EVERYDAY with how to balance photography and family. I worry that my photography is taking away from my family and I struggle sometimes with the fact that having a family is taking away from the job I so passionately love. I feel this job now defines me, and is part of who I am….but so is being a Mom and wife. Luca to me was a double blessing, not only did I gain an amazing son, I also gained a new career that I love more than I ever imagined. Without him I would not have had the opportunity or the time to start this business.
Being pregnant with Luca was the best thing that ever happened to me. I don’t think I would have had the courage to start this career without him. I was accepted into the teachers program shortly after we found out we were pregnant. If I hadn’t been blessed with success in the baby-making department, I would never have turned down the teachers program and I would have never started this path in life. I went on maternity leave 4 months before Luca was born as my contract was up with work. Those 4 months gave me the time I needed to start my business and figure out what I wanted to do.
While in Vegas, one of my roommates and I had a long talk about our businesses and how they were affecting our lives. Our biggest conflict or struggles was comparing ourselves to other photographers. How we would get discouraged if they were doing something we wanted to do, if they were more “successful” than we were, if they seemed to have it more together than we did…whatever the situation was. It made me think back to Jasmine Stars wedding workshop that I watched…..when she first started her business she looked around her at all the other photographers in the industry and thought, “I can’t win at their game!” when comparing herself to other photogs she always felt she fell short. So she decided to win at her own game. She decided to set out her own rules, her own boundaries and rather than trying to succeed at what everyone else was doing, she was going to succeed by being her, by doing what she was doing.
THIS is what I NEED to focus on. THIS is where I NEED to be. I need to stop worrying about what everyone else is doing and focus on investing in me. I need to stop worrying about what other people are thinking, about what other people are doing and just focus on me and my family.
Someone asked Tamara Lackey at her workshop how she managed to get it all done, how she did it with 3 kids at home and how she afforded to start her business and her genius response that has been with me since then is “If this is what you want to do with your life, you can’t afford NOT to invest in it”
This is what I want to do with my life. I want to be a photographer, and I want to be a Mom and a Wife. I need to invest in both. They are the two most important things in my life. I can’t afford to NOT invest in both. I need to take what I learnt at WPPI and use it in my everyday life. I need to take that feeling of inspiration and make it last until next years WPPI.
The WPPI didn’t confirm with me that I wanted to be a Mom and a photographer….I have known that for a long time. It did however show me that I can be successful. That I can invest in me because I am worth it.
Justine Russo Photography 